Tuesday 12 June 2012

infatuation


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think/believe/perceive that I am less than/inferior, whenever an ex gets married/becomes involved with someone else.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want/need/desire to be the only one girl that my partner desires.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think/believe/perceive that partners should be in love/have eyes only for each other.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe in this separation of only two people having to be together forever, within that excluding the rest of existence by separating ourselves/myself into a mind dimension that is not real.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think/believe/perceive that I should be infatuated/in love/have eyes only for one person at a time.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to enjoy the feeling of infatuation, and with that addict myself to it.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become addicted to the feeling of infatuation.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think/believe/perceive that I have become addicted to the feeling of infatuation, and that I cannot live without it.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate within the energetic feeling of infatuation and believe that it is love that I must be feeling, instead of realising that this energetic feeling in my body is not in fact me, but an experience I am having of this physical body, and do not have to accept as me.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want/need/desire/crave/pursue the energetic feeling of infatuation, and compromise myself while doing it.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think/believe/perceive that there is no life without love, which I have mistaken the energetic feeling of infatuation for.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define/perceive the energetic feeling of infatuation as good.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give into the energetic feeling of infatuation and enjoy it, rather than breathing and staying here.
When and as I see myself wanting to experience infatuation, I stop, I breathe, I realise that that desire is not me, but in fact a pattern, a program that is keeping me from realising myself and who I am without any feelings, thoughs and emotions.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want/need/desire to own the person whom I perceived has triggered the energetic feeling of infatuation within me.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be afraid and worried that x is going to want to stop x from being with me and having sex with me.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want/need/desire to stop my partner from being with and having sex with other women.

1 comment:

  1. Hi Hilda, thanks for sharing

    "I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want/need/desire to stop my partner from being with and having sex with other women."

    I suggest this is clarified with actual communication with partner instead of going into the fear of that happening - and if it does, then I suggest looking again at what is being accepted and allowed in the agreement/ relationship.

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